Skip to main content

Lady Audley's Secret, The Finishening: "The vice of heartlessness became the virtue of constancy" and other 'Ooooh' phrases

What happened? Lady Audley's crazy except not, Robert basically wasted a BUNCH of time because George is terrible, and everyone's happy at the end except Alicia (poor Alicia).

But you guys...is Lady Audley's Secret...the gayest novel ever?
the dark brown eyes that were so like the eyes of his lost friend.
"You was oncommon fond of that gent as disappeared at the Court, warn't you, sir?" he said at last.
Robert started at the mention of his dead friend.
"You was oncommon fond of that Mr. Talboys, I've heard say, sir," repeated Luke.

 AND THE ENDING. OMG THE ENDING. All I have for my Kindle note is "ahahahahahahaha." Not ONLY is everything basically the happiest at the end, but George and Robert and Clara are living together. It's like Victorian Noel Coward and I cannot even handle it. Mary Elizabeth Braddon, I bet 50 bucks you had a lot of gay dude friends and this was for them. This was their Brokeback Mountain. Except way better, because there're meerschaum pipes and French novels.

"I just like thinking about your brown eyes."

George, by the way, is not into it. He's totally the James Potter in this James/Sirius situation. Biggest George burn? "If your friendship could have done me any good, I would have appealed to it."

Not ok, George

There's a whole lot that could be gone into re this book. If we were in an English class together, I would be the SUPER-annoying girl raising her hand in a condescending way and talking about Victorians, madwomen in attics, and the overall lack of female autonomy in 19th century society. As it actually stands:

hahaha words and pictures

But seriously, this book was not that good. It had Moments, but most books have moments? I loved Clara, but she is the most transparent Acceptable Female Version of a Dude I've ever seen. What I really want and am really really really sad never happened is a sequel where George actually went to Australia (make up your MIND, George) and Robert and Clara actually do go searching for him. You know who Robert and Clara could be? They could be like Rick and Evie in The Mummy movies. But with more lying idly on the surface of a frozen fishpond, waiting for someone to pick him up (remember when that happened?).

How do people feel about Lady Audley being shut up forever for her own good? She was kind of, y'know, evil. But there's been so much in recent years about 19th century ladies being locked up just because some dudes decided they were crazy that I'm now completely reactionary about it. And her husband was all "Oh yeah, never tell me what you did with her." OMG THAT IS A PERSON. 

Finally, I'm not tellin' you all that there's unfinished Sherlock/Lady Audley's Secret fic, but there is.

GOOD READALONG, Y'ALL. Our minds and GIF folders are all the richer for it.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Book Blogger Hop, Pt II

All right. The question for this week is:  "Do you read only one book at a time, or do you have several going at once?" Oh-ho my. I have an issue with book commitment. I start a new book, and it's exciting and fresh, and I get really jazzed about it, and then 20% of the way through, almost without fail, I start getting bored and want to start another book. I once had seven books going at the same time, because I kept getting bored and starting new ones. It's a sickness. Right now I'm being pretty good and working on The Monk , Northanger Abbey , Kissing the Witch , and I'm about to start Waiting for the Barbarians since my friend lent it to me. But The Monk and NA are basically books I only read when I'm at work, so I don't see it so much as working on four books, as having books in different locales. Yes. This entry wasn't as good as some of the others, but I shall rally on the morrow. Yes I shall.
22 comments
Read more

Fanfiction and Why It Doesn't Suck

Like most female 20somethings, I was at one point very into the fangirling scene. I wrote fanfiction, I made music videos, put together fanmixes, and created horrible graphics using a version of Photoshop I or someone bearing a resemblance to me possibly downloaded in my college dorm room off Limewire. I would here like to interrupt myself by stating that perhaps “most” was the wrong word, as I have met many normal female 20somethings who don’t have a fricking clue what I’m talking about when I use words like “fangirl” or “ship” as a verb involving the romantic involvement of two fictional people. So by “most” I mean “most of the people I met online in fangirl communities.” Or perhaps “all” in that case. Anyway. Fanfiction is probably always going to be controversial, in the dumbest way something can be controversial. Are we talking about climate change? Well, no, we’re talking about whether or not it’s at all okay for a 15-year-old to write a scene where Mulder and Scully get stuck ...
7 comments
Read more

Harry Potter 2013 Readalong Signup Post of Amazingness and Jollity

Okay, people. Here it is. Where you sign up to read the entire Harry Potter series (or to reminisce fondly), starting January 2013, assuming we all survive the Mayan apocalypse. I don't think I'm even going to get to Tina and Bette's reunion on The L Word until after Christmas, so here's hopin'. You guys know how this works. Sign up if you want to. If you're new to the blog, know that we are mostly not going to take this seriously. And when we do take it seriously, it's going to be all Monty Python quotes when we disagree on something like the other person's opinion on Draco Malfoy. So be prepared for your parents being likened to hamsters. If you want to write lengthy, heartfelt essays, that is SWELL. But this is maybe not the readalong for you. It's gonna be more posts with this sort of thing: We're starting Sorceror's/Philosopher's Stone January 4th. Posts will be on Fridays. The first post will be some sort of hilar...
1 comment
Read more