Reading Rambo

I've read just over half of Dickens's novels/novellas, and if we leave out some of the Christmas ones, here they are, ranked mostly by how much I like the couples in them: 1. Bleak House . Bleak House  is the best of all Dickens's work, do not debate me, I will fight you. You've got a take-down of the civil law courts, scheming French ladies, and INSANE colonization ideas. Sir Leicester's love for Lady Dedlock is tear-inducing, and we all appreciate Ada's super-gay love for Esther, I am sure. 2. The Mystery of Edwin Drood . Dickens didn't even finish this book and I love it. There's a possible murder! Mysterious twins! An opium-addicted church choirmaster! 10/10 for Rose/Helena scenes, Dickens. 3. A Christmas Carol . As previously stated , A Christmas Carol  is perfect. 4.  Our Mutual Friend . I should knock this down the list because Dickens pulls a nasty trick on the reader and cheapens the whole book, but Mature Dickens is so  good  and I c...

I think we can all agree that Doctor Who is the shit. Yeah, we all mourn the glory days of Donna Noble, and right now Steven Moffat's causing some problems, but still. Don't tell me you don't get happier when you see someone wearing a TARDIS shirt and that you don't covet this Adipose plushie. SO CUTE The Doctor and River Song were the best relationship that show had seen in decades. Matt Smith and Alex Kingston made you not give a fuck about their 20 year age difference, mostly because their intense chemistry yielded things like this: Nice. Since Matt Smith is now gone and River is potentially only making scant appearances, LET US LOOK TO THE PAST and see what novels these two characters should absolutely have starring roles in: The Great Gatsby . The Doctor is Gatsby, but instead of Daisy weeping over some shirts when he shows her around his giant Look At Me Now house, River-Daisy will slam him against a wall and make out with him. Heart of Darkn...

It's not very good! We've been threatening to read it for years! Here it is. October, 2015. It's Matthew Lewis's The Monk Readalong Time. MARK YOUR CALENDARS RIGHT NOW, for I have the readalong schedule, and chapters 1 and 2 are to be done on the FIRST of October. That's right, we're posting on Thursdays this year, so when you've forgotten to do the reading over the weekend, you still have Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday to get it done. What a relief. How great. Good planning, Alice. October 1st Vol. I Chapters 1-2 October 8th  Vol. I Chapter 3, Vol. II Chapters 1-2 October 15th Vol II, ch. 3-4 October 22nd Vol. III ch. 1-3 October 29th Vol III, ch. 4-5 The free edition for Kindle has it broken up into volumes (we're reading a three volume novel, just like in Oscar Wilde!), so if you have some weirdo different edition, let me know and I'll figure out what you're supposed to be reading. LINK UP BELOW, you know the drill. 

It's the last day of August, so let's look at what I've been reading and not finishing for the last couple months: Empire of Sin: A Story of Sex, Jazz, Murder, and the Battle for Modern New Orleans   This is what I'm currently devoting the most time to, and I'm pretty into it. I can tell you about some major shit that went down in New Orleans at the turn of the century. Also there were prostitutes. A whole lotta prostitutes. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas I've never been interested in the movie, or Hunter S. Thompson in general, but y'know, he invented gonzo journalism, and since that is my JAM, gotta thank him for it. Also I'm fascinated by how very many drugs he can pump into his system in this book and still not die. The Apparitional Lesbian: Female Homosexuality and Modern Culture Lesbians as ghosts! Only usually not literally! Terry Castle makes some pretty good points about how our culture "ghosts" lesbians because they don...

There are subjects I tend to read books about, and then others I am VERY INTERESTED IN that I don't. This isn't on purpose; I've just realized it's the case. So here're a few: 1. TRUE CRIME all the true crime. I grew up with a mother who doesn't like detective novels, but loves true crime. I skimmed books on the Night Stalker on road trips, and am extremely well-versed in shows like City Confidential, Forensic Files, and American Justice . I also know way too much about serial killers, possibly because young females are the primary target , so if you learn about them you can avoid  them. Maybe. If you try hard. But probably not. 2. GIANT MAMMALS OF THE PAST. Maybe there hasn't been a good book about them? I never really had a dinosaur phase (aside from my eternal and undying love for Jurassic Park ) but I love giant mammals of the past. Also birds. And snakes. Ok, basically anything that isn't a dinosaur. TITANOBOA 3. ARCHAEOLOGY. If you'r...

Give me all the books about Mysterious People With Mysterious Pasts, please. Especially if someone has died and there are DARK SECRETS AFOOT. Have I made it clear how much I love dark secrets? Maybe not. Well, it's a lot. I love them a lot. All the dark secrets, please. I was sent this book with the understanding I'd review it, this did not impact my review except for the fact I wrote it, etc etc. Every Secret Thing is about two 11 year old girls who commit murder. OR DO THEY. Oh, and big big warning for those of you who can't handle that sort of thing: the person who dies is a baby. But was it negligence? Pity? SOME OTHER REASON? This totally gets answered and I was pretty satisfied with it. It was a nice little mystery book. Albeit with the whole dead non-adult part in it, but that's not delved into too much, y'know?  I looked up a lot about the Slender Man stabbings while reading this, and then got into a few discussions about whether it's ok to tr...

On Friday, I went to visit my parents/see my nieces/spend time with my little brother. Said little brother and I went to the movies, 'cause that's one of the only things there is to do in my hometown. When we got there, there was a quick debate about what movie to see. "Let's see Vacation ." "I already saw that, and it's got a 27% on RottenTomatoes." "Oh. Then... Ricki and the Flash ?" "Aliiiice, let's see The Man From U.N.C.L.E. , I already saw that too and it's hilarious." "We're not seeing a movie you've already seen. We are going to watch Meryl Streep as an aging rock lady, or whatever that movie's about." "Let's just see Vacation ." "You said you've already seen it AND it has 27%!" "Fiiiiiiiiine." So we bought tickets for Ricki and the Flash , and then the second our tickets were torn, I saw that the N.W.A. biopic  Straight Outta Compton was playi...

So ages and ages ago, I bought the new Elektra volumes by Haden Blackman and Mike Del Mundo, because they're beautiful and gorgeous and well-written. Mmm. But right after starting to read them, I thought 'Ah, Elektra seems to have been created by Frank Miller for the Daredevil series, so how about I read her stuff from the beginning? That sounds like a wise move.' Unfortunately, the show D aredevil had just come out on Netflix, so it took LITERAL months and months for the Dare devil Omnibus to come in at the library. Until finally today it did! And off I went to the library to finally obtain this surely amazingly-done treasure. So many people had been in line before me. Frank Miller has been so praised. So IMAGINE MY CHAGRIN UPON ENCOUNTERING THIS: AHHHHHHHH. OMG. THE EXPOSITION . THE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE EXPOSITION.  Both of the panels I'm posting here are legit in the first three pages of this comic from 1979. Might I remind you that by 1979, we...

Last Saturday I undertook a trip I've been meaning to take for QUITE SOME TIME: Cahokia Mounds in southern Illinois. COME WITH ME ON A JOURNEY to the largest urban settlement in the Mississippian culture of the Native Americans. THEY BUILT SO MUCH Cahokia existed from about 600 AD to 1400 AD, right around St Louis (so where southern Illinois and the Mississippi River meet Missouri). The people who settled there built up giant mounds of earth, the tallest 100 feet high, by carrying baskets and baskets of dirt to one spot FOR DECADES UPON DECADES. The highest is Monks Mound (seen above, it's the one in the distance), which got its name from early 19th century Trappist monks setting themselves up on it. One of them later baptized the son Sacagawea gave birth to on her trek with Lewis & Clark ( Jean Baptiste Charbonneau ). Illinois is pretty much all about Abraham Lincoln, and occasionally we sneak in some Mormon history (prophet Joseph Smith was shot in one of our j...

It was announced today that 21-year-old pop singer Meghan Trainor was canceling the remainder of her "MTrain Tour," which was supposed to run through September 13th, because she has suffered a second vocal cord hemorrhage. Yes. A second. This inevitable second hemorrhage occurred because when her first occurred, her record company gave her a resting period of FIVE DAYS. Five days? The fuck is this, Epic Records? That is a young girl who considered herself a songwriter until last year when you said "Hey, you're gonna sing your own songs," and great, you gave her a record deal. But that girl therefore knows shit  about vocal health. You know who I bet does know? The ENTs and vocal coaches you have daily interactions with, because you're a RECORD COMPANY. You're gonna tell me you thought FIVE. DAYS. was an adequate amount of time to rest when your singer's throat is bleeding? Even this randomass website I pulled up off Google says minimum ...

I've been reading Neil Gaiman's Sandman for a while now, and I've got some feelings about it. Good feelings. Overwhelmingly positive feelings. Feelings SO positive that I will categorically state that it is the greatest contribution to comics ever QUIET ALL OF YOU. REMEMBER THAT TIME HE VISITED HELL so great. Sandman hits on almost everything I like, tone-wise. It's this mix of darkness, but not darkness for darkness's sake, and literary references and myth and seeing the story through the eyes of someone near-omnipotent, but also flawed: who's above human experience, but also enmeshed in it. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. I'm on vol. 5 of the really pretty recolored versions that came out in 2011, so I've got a ways to go, which is good because I NEVER WANT IT TO END NEVER EVER. Said recoloring. Mmm so much better now. I mean. I could do without the Hazel/Foxglove storyline, which you'd think I'd be into, because lesbians before lesbians...

Liane Moriarty! Your specific brand of pop fiction about the modern day family has struck a chord in my heart and I am a fan  of yours now. REMEMBER THIS MEME? Emily at As the Crowe Flies posted about Big Little Lies  aaaages ago, and I thought it looked interesting, but it was v. popular for quite a while, so not easy to obtain. I recently saw it just sitting on my library's shelf, so I grabbed it.  So great! So readable! And it has that brand of "real" characters that makes you think partway through 'If X knew what Y was thinking about them, their feelings would be hurt.' X DOESN'T CARE BECAUSE X DOES NOT EXIST, but try telling your brain that. Bless fiction. Big Little Lies  is about the mothers of a kindergarten class in Pirriwee, Australia. It revolves around three: Jane, Celeste, and Madeline, all of whom are great and I love them and let's all praise Liane Moriarty and her characters. (note: I love Celeste and Madeline more than Jane) H...